My daughter, like most kids, is out of school this week. She is in a year-round school and just finished with first grade last Friday. Since she only has this week off before starting back to school in second grade on Monday, I am trying to spend as much time with her hanging out this week as I can.

We have sort of been on-the-go so far this week, so we decided to make today a stay-at-home (mostly) and take-it-easy kind of day.

We went to the grocery store and purchased hot dogs and buns, along with onion dip to go with the potato chips we already had. And let’s not forget the ingredients for Oreo Cookies and Cream Pie!

They had a table set up with samples. Oh. My. Gosh! My husband has always said I get pulled in by marketing every time. Well, this time I went willingly! That stuff was just too good to pass up. So after a quick lesson on how easy it was to make and a discussion about whether or not I could lessen the fat and calories with skim milk and lite cool-whip, we were off and running to find the makings for this delightful treat. Hey! Somebody needed to reward that nice woman for standing there all day offering people samples. My daughter and I were more than happy to oblige.

Our next stop was the video store located conveniently in the same shopping center. One of our rentals was Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium.

We came home, made our hot dogs, spread out in the middle of the floor with our food and a blanket, and proceeded to have ourselves a picnic while watching the movie.

I am going to have to watch it again…soon. I mean I’m going to have to buy it I think. I must own it so that I can watch it whenever I want. I liked it that much.

I remember when it came out last year before Christmas and was touted as being “the movie” of the holiday season. I saw the trailers for it and thought it looked kind of weird, actually.

Oh people! It was chock (is that a word?) full of such rich life lessons. I don’t even know where to begin, so how ’bout this?

“Do you think I should get a running start?” Eric Applebaum in Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium.

More tomorrow on the context of this question and what it reminded me of.

I mentioned yesterday about a phone call I received on the way home from visiting my family. It was the unexpected, wish you hadn’t received it kind. Not because I wasn’t glad the individual who called had chosen to share with me but because I wish the news was not real.

Some years ago, about nine to be more precise, I worked for a very large company. While there, I worked with and for a gentleman whom I will call “John.” He had a daughter one year older than me, and in the time that I worked there, he became like a father to me. My husband and I attended his daughter’s wedding. The day that I left, I couldn’t stop crying, not because I was leaving the job, but because it felt like the end of a very important relationship.

It wasn’t, of course, although it felt that way at the time.

We have kept in touch over the years. He and his wife came to visit when my daughter was born. I have pictures of both of them holding her when she was a couple of months old.

The phone call yesterday was from him. In hindsight, I realize now he didn’t sound like himself.

He said he needed to share some information with me. He had just gotten out of the hospital on Saturday. He had been diagnosed with kidney and intestinal cancer. He was asking me for prayer.

The doctors think it’s curable, but obviously prayer is in order. Will you please pray for his healing and for peace for he and his family during this time?

We were about to hang up, and I thought I should tell him that I love him…but I couldn’t. You see, I didn’t grow up that way. Saying “I love you” does not come easily to me. As a matter of fact, there are only two people in this world for whom those three words roll easily off my tongue as if it were second nature, and that is my husband and my daughter.

There are many other people in my life whom I love dearly, and I would be heartbroken if anything happened to them, but I don’t tell them that I love them.

There are a couple to whom I will say “love you” before we get off the phone or before parting ways, but even that is an effort for me.

It makes me feel so broken. I do love them, and many others, so very much! So why is this so hard for me?

Last night when I got home, I was standing in the kitchen making dinner for my family and thinking about my conversation with John. I couldn’t help but think about how I almost told him I loved him but didn’t. It was the right thing to say. It was the truth. He probably needed to hear it, and I needed to say it.

My husband tried to reassure me by saying that he was certain that John knows, and I’m sure he does. But that doesn’t change the need to hear it. It certainly doesn’t change MY need to hear it.

God created each of us to love and be loved. He also created us with a need to be told we are loved.

Go find your loved one’s and tell them that you love them. Pick up the phone. Send an email, a handwritten note, whatever. Just do it. They’re waiting to hear, and aren’t we waiting, too?

The more I realize how much family means.

I know I said Friday I had more thoughts to share about She Speaks, and I do, but I need to share this first.

We went to a birthday celebration for my uncle this past weekend who was celebrating the 75 years the good Lord has given him thus far. It was my mother’s side of the family. I don’t have the opportunity to see them very often. With the exception of about three people, none of them have seen my daughter, or me either for that matter, since she was about 18 months old. She is now 7.

If you have followed my blog for any length of time, then you know about my mother’s mental illness. If not, you can read about that here and here.

Of course, the rest of her family isn’t mentally ill, but for some reason, I never see them. My conversations with them are rare as well. Every few months, I will talk with one of my mother’s sisters and catch up on what is going on with everyone, but that’s about it. So when the opportunity came to spend time with them and see everyone again after so many years, I jumped at the chance.

The pig pickin’ (that’s southern talk for a BBQ, and I mean vinegar-based, southeastern North Carolina-styled barbecue) was at the home of my first cousin. She is the oldest daughter of the uncle who was having the birthday, and she also happens to be my mother’s age within a year or two. She and my mother were pregnant at the same time. My cousin with her firstborn and my mother with my younger brother.

Because things were not supposed to begin until 5:30, we had made the decision to stay over at my cousin’s house since it was a 2-hour drive back home. My brother, sister-in-law, and nephew were also staying over because the drive was about the same amount of time for them.

It was such a great weekend! Seeing family and friends I had not seen in so long and catching up was an experience I will not soon forget.

Sunday morning my senses were awakened with the smell of fresh-brewed coffee and country ham. Oh I do love me some country ham. This is not the kind from Honeybaked Ham. This is old-fashioned, salt-cured, I saw my cousin’s husband cutting it off the bone to cook ham. Ham the way I remember it growing up. Scrambled eggs, blueberry pancakes, and bacon with orange juice and milk rounded out the meal. Oh, my mouth is watering again just thinking about it.

We ate, and we talked. And then we ate some more. And then we talked some more. It was truly wonderful! We spent the whole day visiting, and I couldn’t have been happier.

When I went upstairs to pack up our clothes, I told my husband that I had been reminded that we actually spent a lot of time with my cousin’s family when I was younger. She and my mother were good friends, and my brother and her son were pals when they were in elementary school. My brother went to their house for sleepovers, and my second cousin came to my house for sleepovers. I had forgotten about that until yesterday.

We talked some about my mom and how helpless we feel not being able to help her. My cousin teared up. I teared up. It was hard. We don’t understand. I don’t know if I ever will this side of heaven. So I continue trusting that she is in God’s hands, and even though I don’t know why He hasn’t chosen to heal her, He knows what He is doing. I hang on to that.

In the meantime, though, I realize I need to make more of an effort to be with her family. They are a way to be with her without being with her. They love her as I do, and they share the pain that I feel over her illness.

I have missed them. It was good to reconnect. I have vowed to not let so much time pass before I see or talk to them again.

Is there someone whom you need to call or send a note? If so, don’t wait. There’s only now. We aren’t promised tomorrow.

And when you talk to them, make sure you tell them that you love them. Don’t assume they know.

I received an unexpected phone call on the drive home yesterday. I will share more about that tomorrow.